What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and...

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

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Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Are you worried that the 2024 US presidential election will result in a close race?

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Why cant I feel anything in my sleep? I cannot even feel myself moving, breathing, and swallowing saliva! I cannot even hear anything, not even my alarm! Some people that I've been with says that I'm moving a lot in my sleep, how can I stop it?

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

What are the reasons why am I so tired before my period?

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Undercover cops in New York are riding the subways with iPods on to entice robbery. Is that a form of entrapment? If not, why not?

TEXT:

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

What is the degree of influence of Saudi Wahhabism on the modern Muslim world?

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

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Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

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Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Make Nazis afraid again!

Would the word literate carry the same meaning with public (common wealth) in 1900 vs today 2020?

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...